Saturday, June 6, 2020

Staying Home and Doing Stuff


It's been a bit and I don't have a real reason for not writing other than laziness (and the Sims) and general MEH-ness.  I want to write more and I think it would be good for me, but I'm not going to make any promises I can't keep and will just make me feel bad for not keeping them.  A vague half assed commitment is the best I can muster at the moment.

As is the new normal these days, we have been home...a lot...a WHOLE lot. My Beloved rather thrives on this kind of thing, he's very project driven, I'm more of an idea kind of gal.  I'll come up with a great idea, get all ready to execute said idea and then wander off after something shiny.  I'm going to do a cleanse and admit to some of the projects I have started during the "Stay Home" part of "Stay Home Stay Safe".  

First, a disclaimer, all the COVID stuff started as I was recovering from a concussion (cheese injury, don't ask) so I can claim and blame some of this on a brain injury.  Not as much as I'd like, but some.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it so shut up.

Inspiration #1: MINIATURES

This all began when something called "book nooks" started popping up all over Pinterest. They are small, narrow dioramas that slide into a bookshelf and look super cool.

OMGYASINEEDONENOW!!!

You can find these magical slices of tiny amazingness on Etsy and such but they're pretty expensive and I can't justify spending a whole lot of money on something as frivolous albeit adorable thing.  So, I decided that I could totally make one myself and took a dive into the world of miniatures and tiny world building.  Holy crap the scope and expanse of the miniature building world is a wonder to behold.  Being bored as hell, housebound and, currently, possessing the attention span of a toddler living on a diet of Froot Loops and RedBull, I hit Amazon.  In short order, I found ALL THE THINGS, and they were so cute and tiny and I can totally do that, how hard can it be and OH MY GOD THEY HAVE KITS!  A entire room in a box that I can build and that's going to be my new best thing and I'll make one for everyone and I'll even maybe take orders or give them as gifts and COOL!
Add to Cart
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 YAAAASSSSSS!
Gonna be here on Wednesday and I'm going to have so much fun!

In the box:
-Claire's Room Kit (a super adorable bedroom with books and a cozy chair IT'S SO PRETTY)
-Pastry Shop Kit (IT HAS TINY CAKES AND STUFF)
-two bottles of glue
-a teeny tiny tool set
-a "room box" (for displaying my new skill and I'm going to need MOAR SHELVES!)
 
Saved For Later: (because this is going to be my new thing and I'm going to do this forever!)
-1 miniature shop with bay window
-1 miniature shop with double windows
-1 miniature bookshop
-847 different books and book sets for above bookshop
    -Including: 
        -Harry Potter
        -Anne Of Green Gables
        -The Complete Works Of William Shakespeare
        -Chronicles Of Narnia
        -16 Assorted Classics
        -a Set Of Encyclopedias
        -Gray's Anatomy
        -The Iliad
-wallpaper and fabric (tiny, tiny patterns!)
-bookcases and furniture
-itty bitty LED lights
-magnifying glasses of varying strengths
-1,281 other items I'm not willing to admit to desperately wanting

CART TOTAL: $4,322.63

(If I bought the original item that inspired all this madness on Etsy, $325.00)

This is a tiny, adorable rabbit hole that I promise, you will thoroughly enjoy falling down.  I will readily admit to spending some hours happily wading through and building an elaborate fantasy of what I would be creating.  

Yeah, the stuff I actually bought is still in the original boxes.  I got distracted because the world needed masks and I felt compelled to answer the call.  

Which brings us to the next stroke of inspiration...

Inspiration #2: SEWING!

This is something I actually know how to do and had most of the stuff I needed except the elastic.  Tracking that stuff down became a project in and of itself, but I prevailed and acquired 120 yards in relatively short order. 120 yards is one hell of a lot of elastic and I was off to the races.  Happily, this was something I was able to do and fairly quickly master mask making 101. After a few days of humming away with my trusty Brother sewing machine, I had enough masks done for my nearest and dearest as well as my staff and assorted others that needed them.

Thank Goodness For YouTube Tutorials



Inspiration #3: PAINTING

My Beloved and I have been talking about painting the kitchen and the bedroom for ages and now seemed as good a time as any to finally get on with it.  As usual, easier said than done because choosing a paint color is a process BEFORE the painting process.  Bedroom color? Not a problem (you're asleep most of the time in there anyway so BOOM, color picked. Kitchen color?  That one is a fraught and emotional process.  It can't be too dark, as the window faces north and the room is small.  It can't be too light as that shows dirt too easily.  I hate painting trim, so it has to look good with the natural wood that's in there.  It can't be blue, because blue isn't a hungry color.  It's can't be green because we already have a lot of green going on.  It's already yellow so that's out because why would you paint it yellow again?  Gray doesn't work with the cabinets (no, shut your damn mouth, I'm not painting cabinets). Beige is, well, it's beige.  Screw it, we'll come back to the kitchen.  OH LOOK SOMETHING ELSE!

Since we're in the bedroom, we should probably clean out and reorganize the closets and dressers, don't you think?  This is the sneaky spiral they don't tell you about when you buy a house.  No projects ever go as planned, there are pitfalls and distractions around every corner.  If you actually want to accomplish anything, keep your head down, your resolve firm and NEVER deviate from the plan.  Do not open any closets, do not look at any other areas of the house, do not let your mind wander from the task at hand.  That, my friend, is the path to damnation.

THREE HOURS LATER:

I'm sitting on the floor of the closet, wearing two summer straw hats, a set of mardi gras beads, sunglasses with a lens missing, one pink high heeled shoe and a sequined scarf of unknown provenance flipping through my highschool yearbook with a cat on my lap.  Surrounding me are boxes, bins, empty hangars, a disarrayed heap of clothing, a pile of shoes, a disturbing number of purses and assorted hats, sweaters, blankets and a largely unexplored box of God knows what.  My Beloved fares no better as he tackles the two dressers in the room, determined to weed out any and all interloping clothing of no use.  He's actually worse than me when it comes to getting distracted.  He's currently sitting on the bed, reading old mail and rummaging through the firebox of files and documents intermittently muttering to himself and asking me random questions like: "When was the last time we used the shop vac?" or "Did you ever call the guy about the thing with the whatever that was?" and "What is that chicken doing in there?" (It's not like that, it's a ceramic chicken I found at a yard sale, brought it home and forgot about it until it reemerged on a shelf in the hall closet.)
The haul from the closet was wide a varied, some things making perfect sense with logical reasons for being there and a number of artifacts for which there is no earthly explanation.

-The aforementioned Mardi Gras beads (I've never been to a Mardi Gras soiree)
-A green plaid stuffed pig (I have no idea where it came from)
-Shoe box of Legos and crayons (I haven't had a Lego builder around for years)
-A bin of yarn and crochet hooks (I actually did crochet at one point)
-Three sets of long johns (all different sizes)
-A box of picture frames (I got them on clearance, settle down)
-Two bottles of glitter (one silver, one blue)
-A plastic horned helmet (think Ride Of The Valkyrie)
- A bottle of bubble stuff 
-Half a dozen golf balls (why? what? we don't golf)
-A cowboy boot I swear I've never seen before 
-One dead mouse
Yeah, my closet looks nothing like this


At this point, I decide it's time to leave for a long time while my Beloved disposes of the desiccated husk that was once a rodent invader of the inner sanctum.  
Having managed to get the closets done but still nowhere near doing the planned project of painting, both my Beloved and I decide it's time to reassess.  Translation, binge watch Deadliest Catch and eat snacks while we discuss our lofty house painting goals.
It's June, nothing has been painted yet.  We'll get there, sure we will.

During this time of staying home, I have also:
     -killed a dozen small succulents (the plastic ones look just as good)
    -made terrible pie crust (I have no earthly idea how I went wrong)
    -colored an entire swear word coloring book (I can art)
    -moved furniture (I have no eye for what will fit where)
    -moved it back (it was fine, best left alone)
    -bought new pots and pans (Calphalon...I'm goddamned fancy now!)
    -moved my eldest to a new city (that was weird, being the only cars on the road for miles)
    -utterly destroyed any illusion I have that I can draw (yeah...ew)
    -read a dozen or so books I've been meaning to read (and have a dozen more waiting in the wings)
    -thought about taking up knitting or needlepoint and laughed and laughed (seriously)
    -organized my iTunes music collection (weeded out some seriously whiny early 90s shit)
    -cleaned out the kitchen pantry (when did I buy that many crackers?)

I have learned a lot about not being busy all the time.  It's okay and I kind of like this forced solitude.  I've allowed myself to be comfortable being alone without the need to be anywhere.  I look forward to having places to go and people to see, but I've also become more at ease with being alone than I used to be.  I am pretty good company, after all.